Good, But Not Right
by NickyM96
Summary: Josh is back and he wants Beckett. Light Caskett fluff - not a lot happens.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Good, But Not Right

Author: NickyM96

Rating: K+

Summary: Josh is back and he wants Beckett. Light Caskett fluff - not a lot happens.

Spoilers: Current season stuff

Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me. I'm just borrowing them for my own entertainment purpose and will return them for the next user when done.

Chapter 1

She lets out a contented sigh as she rolls over in the bed, reaching out for him. Her hand encounters empty space.

"Castle?" she calls out, smiling when she spots him standing by the window. "Good morning."

Her smile turns into a frown when she notices his frown - and when she doesn't hear the question he asks her every morning they wake up together.

"Are you okay?" she asks him when he continues to scowl at her.

"I think I'm the one who should be asking you that."

She cringes.

"You're still upset with me," she concludes.

"Upset? Beckett, upset doesn't begin to cover it. How could you …"

"Do my job?" she asks, sitting up in the bed, giving him a scowl of her own. "I was just doing my job."

"That guy grabbed you. He pushed you down to the ground. I was terrified," he confesses. "And I was enraged. Things are different now. You have no business …"

"Don't say it," she growls at him. "Don't you even think of letting the words come out of your mouth!"

She looks around, suddenly itching to throw something at him. The only thing nearby is a pillow. Somehow she doesn't think it will get the point across. Instead, she jumps out of bed and stalks across the room … and immediately stumbles on her unsteady legs. Her head is swimming and the lurching in her stomach is more than she can handle. She reaches the wastebasket just in time.

When the awful retching is over, she feels Castle lift her hair out the way and press a cool, wet cloth to the back of her neck. A glass of water is pressed into her hands next.

"So you can rinse your mouth," he says sheepishly. "Let's get you back into bed."

They slowly walk back across the room and he tucks her in, handing her the pack of crackers they keep on the nightstand.

"Sorry. I was an idiot," he apologizes. He brushes the hair off her forehead before pressing a kiss there.

"No, Castle. You're right," she sighs. "Things are different now and I have no business being out on the streets. I just didn't want to admit it anymore than I want to admit that I can't even zip my jeans anymore. I'll talk to Gates today."

"Kate, I …"

"Castle, no," she says, grabbing his hand and placing it on the small mound her belly has become. "You had every right to be angry and to call me out on my stubbornness."

"But I made you sick," he says guiltily. "I know you're not your best in the mornings."

She just smiles and hugs him.

"I love you," she whispers.

"Let's restart this day," he suggests, climbing over her to lay in the bed next to her. When they get settled, he turns to her and says, "Good morning."

She smiles, knowing what's coming next.

"Marry me."

Her heart melts hearing the words, even though it's been their morning routine for months.

"Soon," she whispers, giving him her usual response. She snuggles deep into his arms and sighs in contentment. "Never stop asking, promise?"

"Promise."


	2. Chapter 2

Good, But Not Right

Chapter 2

Beckett frowns at her watch as the time creeps closer and closer to end of shift. She's been waiting on Castle since lunch when he'd promise he'd be there.

"Still waiting on Castle?" Esposito asks. "He still mad about yesterday?"

"He was," Beckett admits. "Probably madder than I've ever seen him."

"Well, things _are_ different now," Ryan chimes in. "He was just worried about the … _baby_."

Ryan says the last word in a whisper, looking around to make sure no one overheard him.

"We're all worried," Esposito says. "Yesterday was scary."

"I know, I know. I get it," she says, exasperated. "I didn't think. It won't happen again. Castle and I are talking to Gates. If he ever gets here, that is."

"Why didn't he just come in with you this morning like usual?"

"He had a phone conference with his publishing company. He was supposed to get here a little after lunch so we can talk to Gates before end of shift," Beckett explains.

"Well, he better get here quickly," Ryan nods towards Gates' office. "She looks like she's about to pack up and leave for the day."

Beckett looks into the office and mutters a curse under her breath. She looks towards the elevators, hoping to see Castle get off. But several more minutes prove he's a no show.

"I have to talk to her today. I guess I have to do it alone," she sighs.

"Good luck," the guys call out to her as she walks towards the office.

She knocks on the door and waits until she hears the captain call out "Come in" before entering.

"Detective Beckett. What can I do for you today?"

"I, uh …" Beckett paces nervously around the office. "I need to talk to you about something. It's personal, but it affects my work."

"Is this about Mr. Castle?"

"Castle? No. I mean, not directly. Well, sort of. I mean, he's involved and responsible. Well, we both were willing participants, but …"

"Detective Beckett," Gates says, raising her hand to stop her. "You're babbling and not making any sense. Start again, please. And make it coherent this time."

"Sorry," Beckett apologizes with a nervous laugh. She lets out a deep breath and starts again, deciding to just spit it out this time. "Sir, Castle and I are a couple."

Captain Gates just smiles.

"I know."

"And I'm pregnant," Beckett continues. "Wait, you know?"

"Wait, what? A baby? That, I didn't know," Gates says, true surprise on her face. "Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure," Beckett chuckles, turning sideways and running her hand over her small bump. "I won't be able to hide it much longer. Sir, how did you know about Castle and me?"

"I thought everyone knew" Gates shrugs. "Rumors about the two of you have been going around for years."

"Sir, we didn't get together until my suspension last year."

Another surprise look crosses Gates' face.

"Well, Detective. That's twice today you've managed to shock me. Anything else you need to say, make it three for three?"

"No, this is it. Like I said before, I wasn't going to be able to hide it much longer. Time ran out for me not saying anything about the baby. I didn't have a choice any longer. Castle had a fit yesterday when things got a little rough with a suspect."

"As well he should have," Gates interrupts her. "You shouldn't be out chasing down perps. Now, I won't take you off your team, Detective. But the dynamics have to change. Let Ryan and Esposito do the legwork. You are not to go back out on the streets, is that clear?"

"Yes, Sir."

"It's nothing against your skill as a police officer. You're the best I have, Beckett. It's just..."

"Sir, I completely understand and agree," Beckett says. "I won't let a repeat of yesterday happen."

"See that it doesn't. And Detective Beckett?"

"Yes Sir?"

"Congratulations. To both you and Mr. Castle. I wish you both … hold that thought," Gates says when her phone rings.

"I'm in a meeting," is all she says when she notices the caller ID. She's even more annoyed at the nerve of the caller to just ignore her and keep speaking. But the more she listens, the more her annoyance gives way to concern.

"You all come on in. We'll talk about this now."

Beckett is about to leave when Gates holds up a finger to stop her.

"You have a meeting. I'll go now," Beckett says, trying to leave the office.

"You need to stay, Detective. And have a seat."

"Sir?" Beckett asks, confused when she sees Ryan, Esposito, and Lanie come into the office. "What's going on?"

"Sweetie, Alexis has been trying to reach you," Lanie explains. "When she couldn't get your cell or desk, she called the guys."

"What's going on?" Beckett asks again, this time fear gripping her by the throat. "Is she alright? Is Castle? Did something happen?"

"Castle and Alexis are fine," Esposito assures her. "They're at the hospital, though. Castle's mom had a heart attack."

"What? Martha? What happened? When? How is she?" Beckett starts to breathe too fast and Ryan forces her down into a chair before she faints.

"Calm down, Detective," Gates orders. Her sharp, crisp voice shakes Beckett from her panic. "Right now, these guys are going to take you to the hospital. Mr. Castle is probably worried about his mother."

"You're right," Beckett says, forcing her breathing to slow. "I have to get to the hospital. I need to get to him."

She gets shakily on her feet.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay?" Lanie asks.

"I have to be. Castle needs me."


	3. Chapter 3

Good, But Not Right

Chapter 3

She all but runs down the hospital corridor, flashing her badge to anyone she thinks can help her find out where Martha is. She finally is pointed to the surgical floor where she sees Castle and Alexis huddled together on a sofa in a lounge.

"Castle."

He looks up when she calls his name and lets out a breath he probably didn't even realize he was holding.

Her eyes tear up at the lost, helpless look on his face.

"Kate. You're here. I called … the phone wouldn't work." He stares down at his phone with confusion. "Why didn't my phone work?"

"It's okay," she says softly, sitting on the other side of him on the sofa. "Alexis called and reached me at the station. How is Martha?"

"She's in surgery," Alexis says when Castle still seems unable to get it together. "We're just waiting and praying she makes it through."

The girl's tears makes Beckett's eyes well up even more.

"Your Gram is a tough lady," Beckett tells her with a watery grin. "She's going to make it through this, then probably write a play all about it."

Beckett sits with Castle and Alexis for as long as she could before one of her increasingly frequent trips to the bathroom becomes necessary. When she gets back, the two are gone.

"Martha is out of surgery," Lanie explains quickly when she notices the look of fear and panic come across Beckett's face. "Castle and Alexis went to her room."

"That's good," Beckett nods, letting out her own relieved sigh. "That's great news. She's going to be okay, right?"

But now that Castle and Alexis are gone, it all hits her at once.

"Oh my God, Lanie," she shudders. "If something had happened to her …"

"Hey, she's going to be fine," Lanie says, grabbing her crying friend into a fierce hug. "Calm down. You're going to make yourself sick. Clean your face up and try to look pretty. The surgeon wanted to speak with you."

"With me?" she asks as she wipes the tears from her face. "Why does the surgeon want to speak with me?"

"Hello, Kate."

Beckett turns around to the familiar voice that calls to her.

"Josh."


	4. Chapter 4

Good, But Not Right

Chapter 4

"What are you doing back in the states?" Beckett asks her ex. "You left nearly two years ago."

"I missed you," Josh confesses.

"Josh, I … "

"Beckett!" Alexis calls out excitedly. "Gram's awake and she's asking for you."

Beckett gives Josh an apologetic look.

"Go," he nods. "We'll talk later."

She pauses for a moment before agreeing.

"Later."

She takes Alexis' outstretched hand and allows the girl to lead her to Martha's hospital room.

Despite her own time in the hospital, she wasn't quite expecting the sight that greeted her. The usually vibrant and vigorous force of nature known as Martha Rogers lay weak and pale in a sea of wires and tubes.

"Hey," Beckett says, swallowing back her own grief and fear. "You look amazing. How are you feeling?"

"Lucky," Martha whispers. "Lucky to be alive."

Beckett tries to smile, but the tears come instead and she finds herself holding desperately to one of Martha's hands.

"Don't do that to me again. I already lost one mother. I can't lose you too."

"Kate, darling. Oh, I love you too, Sweetheart. I'm not going anywhere. I have a new grandchild to spoil rotten. You better believe I'm going to stick around for that."

"I'm going to hold you to that." Beckett kisses her on the cheek and turns to leave. Castle follows her outside.

"Are you okay?"

"Just emotional today. Can't seem to stop the tears," she admits. "It's actually kind of annoying. I'm supposed to be tough."

"Hormones."

With a small smile, he opens his arms and she eagerly goes into them, relaxing into the warm feel of him.

"How are you? Today must have scared you. What happened?"

"It was terrifying," he says. He leads her over the line of chairs against the far wall and eases her into one of them. He sits next to her and grabs her hand, not sure if it's to comfort her or himself. "I heard her collapse. I was on my way out the door to meet you when she grabbed her left arm and fell to the floor.

"I called 9-1-1 then grabbed the AED I had bought after that first aid class the department made us take. Thank God I bought it. I just thought it was going to be a cool toy. But it saved my mother's life."

"And you fortunately had the best surgeon working on her."

"Ah yes. Dr. Motorcycle Boy. This is the second time he's saved a woman I love." Castle touches the place where he knows her bullet wound is. "I think it's time he graduated to a more respectful moniker."

"Oh yeah?" Beckett asks with a smile. "Let me know when you find one."

Her giggles can be heard down the hall as he gives her a list of even sillier names for the man.

Hours later, Beckett, Castle, and Alexis settle in a couple of recliners Castle managed to have smuggled into Martha's hospital room. Alexis is asleep in her chair that's stationed right next to Martha's bed so that they can hold hands. Beckett and Castle share the other one. They drift off to an uneasy sleep in each other's arms.

Josh finds them like that the next morning.

"Mr. Castle," he whispers, not wanting to wake any of the ladies.

Castle stirs at his name being called and looks up to see Josh standing next to his chair.

"Doctor. Is it morning already?" Castle looks down at his watch and notes the time. He slept longer than he intended. "Are you here to check on my mother?"

"Making sure the surgery site is remaining infection free," Josh tells him. "The nurses will be checking on her again in a few hours."

"Yeah, they were in and out of here all night," Castle says with a yawn.

"Is that all?" Castle asks after an uncomfortable silence.

"Actually, can I speak with you outside for a moment?"

Both men look at Beckett and know that she doesn't need to hear whatever it is they're going to say.

"Sure," Castle agrees. He tries to ease out of the chair without waking Beckett, but she's practically laying on top of him. She stirs when he tries to move her.

"Shh, go back to sleep," he whispers, hoping she won't wake all the way up.

"Castle? Is it morning already?" she groggily asks, slowly blinking open her eyes.

"It's early still. Go back to sleep. The doctor is here to check on Mother. I'm just going to go talk to him outside."

"No, I'm up," she yawns. "Good morning."

She waits a few seconds, then pouts when she doesn't hear what she expects. "You didn't propose."

"Not this morning, Sunshine," he chuckles. "Kind of awkward proposing in front of your ex."

Her brow wrinkles in confusion before she remembers him mentioning the doctor checking on Martha. She turns her head and sees Josh standing on the other side of the room.

"I'm embarrassed," she says, pulling the blanket over her head. "And I look horrible."

"You're beautiful, as usual," Castle assures her, laughing at her antics.

"Shut up, Castle," she growls. She turns her scowl on Josh when she hears him laughing as well. "Help me up. I need to pee."

Still chuckling, Castle first kneels down and slides her shoes onto her feet. Then he pulls on her hands to haul her to her feet.

She stretches the kinks out her back and the tank top she slept in clings to her belly.

"You're pregnant," Josh suddenly realizes.

She pauses, looks down with a smile and caresses her stomach.

"I am, yes."

"Oh," is all he says and she continues on to the bathroom.

Castle walks out the room and waits on the other side of the door for Josh.

"I came back for her. But she didn't wait for me, did she?" Josh starts.

He shakes his head, not needing an answer from Castle.

"She seems happy," he continues. "Content. Settled. I guess the thing with her mom worked out?"

"Not in the way she probably hopes. But she's accepted it," Castle explains. "She was ready to start her life."

"She was ready for you," Josh corrects him. "I don't think it was ever about her mom. At least, not by the time I met her. It was always about you."

Castle shrugs.

"I don't know what to tell you, Josh. I love her. She loves me. I'm never walking away from her."

"You mean the way I did?"

"That's between you and her. I'm going to leave you two alone to work it out."

Castle leaves the man standing there wondering if there's any hope at all left for him. This time he's determined to not give up without a fight.


	5. Chapter 5

Good, But Not Right

Chapter 5

Beckett steps out the hospital room and looks up and down the corridor.

"Josh. You're still here," she says, kind of surprised.

"You said we could talk later. It's later."

"Where's Castle?"

"He left," Josh says with a shrug. "I guess congratulations are in order."

Beckett bristles at the frosty tone to his voice, but she doesn't shrink away in fear.

"Thank you." She places both hands on her stomach and gives it a rub. "We're excited."

"I wasn't going to be gone forever, Kate. You said you just needed space."

"Josh …"

"No, let me finish," he interrupts her. "After your shooting, _after I took a bullet from your chest_, you said you needed to be alone. That you just needed some space and some time. What happened between then and now?"

"I realized that what I needed was Castle."

"So, this is it for you? He's what you want? What makes him better than me?"

"Josh, it isn't about that," she tries to explain. "You are a good man. And what we had together was good. But it wasn't right."

He scowls, but she continues.

"What Castle and I have is good too. But it's also frustrating and maddening. Exciting and adventurous. Fun, amazing, romantic, and even silly at times," she says with a smile. "Add it all up and it's better than good with us. It's better than right. It's perfect."

"Wow. I've never heard you so passionate about anything," Josh muses.

"Must be the pregnancy hormones," she says with a laugh, before sobering. "But seriously, you really are a good man. And one day, you're going to meet a woman who can love you the way you deserve to be loved."

"The way you love Castle?"

"Yes," she nods. "And the way he loves me."

Josh holds out a hand and waits for her to grab it. He pulls her close and kisses her on the cheek.

"Have a nice life, Kate. You deserve it."

With one last look, he walks away.

As soon as he's out of sight, Castle comes from the other direction, two cups of coffee in hand. And a few people in tow.

"Look who I ran into," he says cheerfully, nodding to Ryan, Esposito and Lanie. "They came to visit Mother."

"Perfect timing," Beckett says. "She just woke up. Go on in and say hello. Alexis is in there with her."

Castle waits until they're in the room before turning back to Beckett.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Just kind of sad for him, you know?"

"I know."

He hands her one of the cups of coffee.

"Half decaf, half regular. Just this once," he warns. "No more caffeine after this."

"You're sweet," she smiles, reaching up to kiss him.

"And to hear you tell it, I'm also maddening, romantic and silly," he laughs.

"You heard that, huh?" She smiles and takes a sip of the rich coffee she's missed so much. "Thanks for giving us that time."

"I feel bad for him, too. I know what it's like to not be able to be with you. But to have you, then lose you …. it would kill me."

"He never had me," she says. "My heart's always belonged to you, Castle. I think I fell in love with you the first time I ever read one of your books. It's always been you, and it always will be."

Something inside her suddenly clicks and she knows that it's time. She pulls her necklace off and gives him one of the rings.

"I think there's something you forgot to ask me this morning," she says, tears starting to fill her eyes.

He looks down at the ring and smiles. Getting down on one knee, he gazes up at her and says "Katherine Beckett, will you marry me?"

She doesn't wait even a second before giving him her answer.

"Yes, Castle. A thousand times yes."

He hops back to his feet and grabs her in a hug, spinning her around and around until they're both dizzy. Her giggles are drowned out by the cheers and applause that erupts behind them as Ryan, Esposito, Lanie and Alexis come out the hospital room, having witnessed the proposal through the window. But Castle and Beckett don't see or hear anything. They only have eyes for each other.

The end.

Thanks for reading!


End file.
